You know sequels huh? Basically the same thing happens as in the first one but it's never as good. So I was drifting off to sleep last night thinking "I'll call this one Born of Frustration when I write it tomorrow". Then I thought I'd probably used it before- you know, it sums bookmaking up, it's a quality indie song etc. And I was right, I had. At this exact same meeting last year. This one was just as frustrating and this blog is likely to be just that little bit worse than last years. Frustrating.
It's Kelso isn't it? The land of eternal promise, decent fields, competitive looking racing, 8 race cards but the results handed out with the pies, though the pies are excellent in fairness. Hope springs eternal before being dashed on a wave of victorious jollies, often after hitting unfeasible prices in running.
Good to see our friends Allan and Tony yesterday, where we lamented the various failings of our teams (Rangers, Everton, Liverpool and Man Utd in no particular order) - at least a couple of us had winners in that respect on Saturday.
Without further ado, and because I am taking my two favourite ladies in the whole world to the delights of the Atholl Palace Christmas Fayre, I will crack on- you've probably already see the results, which were far from bookmaker friendly, but did the system save us?
1) Doubts that we would get a liability on Lucinda's jolly, Cadell, were dispelled as a decent earlier bet at evens and a procession of continued support ensured that we were close to max along with an unexpected liability on Chance the Robin, maybe there was a convention of 3 wheeled car enthusiasts in. Regardless we got off the the best possible start despite the fav shortening as the winner, 2nd fav Kerryhill, shortened even more and was a great result in the book. I took great delight in pointing out to Steve the more important moral tenner winner in the forecast. He looked weary already.
2) Lucinda jolly that always wins at Kelso and hits 50s in running with a max liability beating the jackpot that hit about 1.02 before getting snagged? Welcome to Kelso and, at that point, you were welcome to it. Most of race 1's profit and all of race 1's optimism evaporated in the final 50 yards. It's the hope that kills you.
3) Normal-ish looking book with the top 2 in for half maxes but the big winners were living in the middle of the book and a smallish win was eked out on 14/1 shot Butler's Brief near the relegation zone of the list. Before telling me on Twitter that we're doing it wrong and we should be winning the GDP of a small nation on a double figure winner at Kelso please refer to race 1. Still stung a bit though.
4) More like it. Stuck the top 2 in for maxes which gave us a normal book for the 4th race running and this time it was the middle of the market that prevailed and gave us a jackpot on Red Happy. I even took the opportunity to belt out the Pharell Williams earworm. Paul next door shook his head in despair. He's in for a shock at the next meeting when the Christmas jumpers come out and me and Ingrid duet "Baby It's Cold Outside" for 3 straight hours.
5) Smashed up 2nd fav, Gentleman De Mai was first past the post here to give us a moderate win, though we had to endure the bing bong of doom for what seemed an eternity before we could let out a sigh of relief. We thought it looked ok live but the exchanges were only about 1/2 on our side and the longer it went on the more we feared a reverse in favour of the max liability jolly No Regrets. I belted that one out as well- so badly, it transpired, that Steve pointed out that he never expected me to sing Robbie Williams despite me "singing" an entirely different song.
6) More race 2 type misery here though as jackpot 1, Eden Mill, and jackpot 2, Millie of Mayo both went short in running before the patented Kelso "jolly for the max defies big in running price to prevail and break bookmaker hearts" and give us a half max loss. Other bogeys were scattered across the card like dreams of results at Kelso cast across a windy car park. The more observant will notice that it was the 6th jolly running we had as a loser. We'll be getting a reputation...
7) We broke our streak here by only having one of the joint favourites in (Allibaba) whilst Secret Secret was a small winner. Bullet dodged despite the places being rotten when September Daisy run on from somewhere near Jedburgh to wipe out the win profit.
8) And, for the 3rd time today, we have 2 jackpots hitting odds on before a seemingly beaten favourite gets up. It was a tiny loser as the big liabilities were on Al Kalila and Presently but it was another metaphorical punch to the stomach and another actual kicking of the joint. The ankle is healing nicely though.
So we leave Kelso with yet another conversation along the lines of "we did well to have a decent day despite the results" but just once in a while I'd like those 1.08 jackpots to hang on/go past when cruising. Overall I think the system helped us, we won nicely on a day when we could easily have lost 5-2-1, but another tale of what might have been at Kelso. Just needed Jim Bowen to pop us to jauntily tell us what we could've won. We know Jim, we know.
Next year this one is slated for the morning slot and will probably start at around 10am, sacrificed on the altar of Premierisation. It's still not a word and we almost certainly won't be going as a 4am alarm call for a likely decimated crowd and a 5 hour round trip doesn't really appeal. At least Steve gets his birthday weekend back.
Ding Dong Merrily on High for me, personally, for the rest of the day and Fighting Fifth weekend next up for us as a business, with the possibility of calling in at Musselburgh on the way there.
Until then...